Power: Where to Find It and What to Do With It

We all want it, but most of us are going about it all wrong.

Lack of power, that was our dilemma. We had to find a power by which we could live, and it had to be a Power greater than ourselves. Obviously. But where and how were we to find this Power? Well, that's exactly what this book is about. Its main object is to enable you to find a Power greater than yourself which will solve your problem.

The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous

I was a devout 12 stepper for the better part of twenty years. I still have great respect and gratitude for the 12 steps and try to live according to their principles. In meetings, I would often refer to the above quote from the “Big Book,” which succinctly describes why it was written and what it’s intended to achieve. Basically, people drink, use drugs, binge eat, and engage in other harmful behaviors to deal with their lack of power over reality. Our lack power stems from myriad causes. People won’t do what we want them to. We don’t have as much money, fame, and sex as we want. We are not who we want to be. We numb ourselves to cope with the anger that comes from our lack of power to change our circumstances. 

I was thinking about the subject power on my run this morning while listening to Andrew Huberman interview Robert Greene on the former’s podcast. Greene is the bestselling author of titles like The Art of Seduction, Mastery, and The 48 Laws of Power. Though I didn’t listen to all of the three hour interview yet, the initial discussion provided more than sufficient fodder for a post about power. 

The conversation starts on the topic of mastery and how to develop it. Greene explains the process by which one finds something to master, saying most of us have natural inclinations when we’re young —we gravitate towards words, numbers, music, movement, etc. When we’re young, we are more likely to have space to indulge these inclinations, but as we grow older and are placed in rigid societal structures like school, work, and HOAs, we blunt the call of our inclinations. We do stuff we’re supposed to do —getting jobs, getting married, buying homes, cleaning gutters , etc.—and before long we’re living lives we had little part in creating. Divorced from passion and natural leanings, we lose our sense of personal power and agency. This loss channels itself into various negative pathways such as addiction, depression, anxiety, etc. 

“Locus of control” is a psychological term often preceded by the words internal or external. Someone with an internal locus of control primarily finds direction from within, living the way he or she chooses, looking towards his or her intellectual and perceptual compass for direction and validation. Someone with an external locus of control does the opposite, relying on people, circumstances, and symbols outside him or herself for direction and validation. It’s fair to say that my description of the powerless addict has an external locus of control —that their dissatisfaction stems from the feeling they lack the power to change things outside themselves in the way they want. Fittingly, the 12 steps are designed to connect these ostensibly powerless people with an indwelling divine power that shifts perspectives from what can the world do for them (external locus of control) to what can they do for the world (internal locus of control). 

The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.

George Orwell, 1984        

Few things today present a bigger barrier to discovering our natural inclinations or forming an internal locus than the internet, which barrages users with ideas about how they should act and think, about which wars they should support, about which pharmaceuticals they should take, about who or what they should find attractive. In the din of these messages, which many people receive for most of their waking hours, there’s little space to listen to what’s going on inside.        

I think the first step to finding purpose and gaining a sense of personal power is tuning out external noise, be it from the internet, TV, or our families, and tuning into what Christians would call the “still, small voice”—it’s that gentle, but often obstinate voice telling us what’s good for us and what we should be doing, and also telling us what’s not good for us and what we should not be doing.

Song of the day: